Ostrich - Speak... Hell what more can i say???!!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Smoke screen Begone!

A long absence, a short abstinence and a tiny little twitching pain in the dead centre of my uni-brow, if I had one. Its been three weeks since my last cigarette. 7 years and 15 cigarettes a day later I have woken up to the fact that smoking is like too much make up. Its only looks cool in professionally taken photographs with nice lighting. I wish I’d figured it out earlier. There is nothing cool about the little black hard bits, set in clear sputum that my lungs cough up or the recent throat swab I just had… except maybe that old, familiar, beautiful feeling of the smoke curling down your throat and snaking out your nose…

There is no question about how disgusting a habit it is. And there is absolutely no debate about how damn good it feels. The psychological addiction of having a cigarette between your fingers and the various physiological and geographical associations you make with them is as strong a bond as your closest school friendships. Quitting is like restructuring your life in more ways than just kicking a habit. It’s changing a huge part of who you are. Saying “I’m not a smoker” is something that involves rewiring a large part of your brain.

I had a very long life line on my left palm that extended nearly up to the middle of my wrist. In 7 years as a smoker it’s shrunk considerably to a modest curve that ends just below my mound of Venus. Hopefully I will stay cigarette free and it will work like Wonder-Gro, returning my Life line to its former meandering glory.

So far I’ve survived a 3 day non-stop weekend of drinking with a big bunch of smokers, living with a smoker and perhaps its the passive smoke that’s gotten me through these last few weeks in one piece. But it looks good. I make a living with my voice. Smoking for me is like coming to work drunk every single day and sexually harassing my co-workers.

*Flexes muscles in show of strength and resolve*


At 9:55 PM, Blogger transience said...

ah. i admire your tenacity. that golden voice should stay that way. golden.

At 10:02 PM, Blogger Rat said...

WOW !!! I am SO impressed Ostrich. Very motivated myself as well now... Go cut those records baby. Hugs!!!!!

At 11:37 PM, Blogger Manish Bhatt said...

Yayyy! You quit smoking. Join the littlest minority in the universe (of people who've quit smoking and lived to tell the tale.) It's been 8 months for me, and yes, it feels good.

And wouldja believe that your posts were thoroughly missed and your blog regularly checked in your absence.

Welcome back Os!

At 3:00 AM, Blogger Ostrich said...

Trans- why thank you my dear. Those were my thoughts exactly :)

Rat- If i can do it, believe me you can

Manish- 8 months, thats awesome. flex muscles with me and make loud victorious grunting sounds :) and thank you for the shweetness. You're shwell

At 5:10 AM, Blogger Tartrazina said...

3 cheerses!

At 6:20 AM, Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Good for you!!! I really need to quit but it's just so damn hard. And you get bonus points for living and partying with smokers and not taking a drag here and there...I think living with a smoker when you yourself are trying to quit is one of THE hardest things to do.

Keep on flexing those muscles! :)

At 8:07 PM, Blogger LiVEwiRe said...

Very nice to see you back! Dropping the habit will be kinder to your voice although it is hard to break away. Good for you!

At 8:17 PM, Blogger the wheel said...

Congratulations and good luck with it. I started again recently after quitting for 3 years (see this post). I'm planning on quitting again in a couple of weeks. We'll see how that goes.

At 9:36 AM, Blogger Mint Chutney said...

YEA!! Non-smokers of the world unite!

At 2:37 AM, Blogger Ostrich said...

Tart- Aye, tart, aye

Stacey- You quit for ten years? Wow! you are officially my inspiration, i'll just ignore what came after!

Livewire- Kinder like you wont believe! Daybefore i stayed home all day and worked on my vocal excercises because i was enjoying the new open quality of my voicee so much. Its a huge tonal difference.

Skrambled- Thanks man. REad your post. There really is nothing as pleasurable as a cigarette. like those after a big meal, with nice big cup of tea on a rainy day and after sex. Its so unfortunate it has such loathesome consequences. *sigh*

Mint- I like both clubs unfortunately :) But i intend on staying in this one.

At 3:59 PM, Blogger Naaz said...

stick with the program babe!!!

At 4:44 AM, Blogger Mandar said...

Bangalore Bloggers' Meet. Details here.

At 5:15 AM, Blogger the still dancer said...

beantown blogbash. tomorrow, barrista st. mark's road. five in the evening. be there. kaashyapeya.blogspot.com or mrmdesai.blogspot.com for details.
Also, join the bangalore bloggers google group. details on the same two blogs.

At 2:38 PM, Blogger Roger Stevens said...

I know it's scary - but it takes about a year. Just a couple of weeks for the physical addiction to wear off - but the psychological addiction takes longer.

But there does come a time when you stop thinking about it - and don't miss it at all.

Just stick with it. And good luck!

At 9:16 PM, Blogger banzai cat said...

Wow. That's a lot of willpower. I've been smoking for seven years and though it's gotten a lot stronger, at least I haven't gotten the severe bad habits like smoking in bed, doing 3 packs a day and stuff like that.

Good luck on the resolve! :-)

At 12:19 PM, Blogger Murphy said...

Bill Hicks -
"When you're trying to quit, every cigarette looks like it was hand picked by god, rolled by jesus and moistened shut by claudia schiffer's pussy."
Luck !

At 11:12 AM, Blogger sexedman said...

I have a nicotine withdrawl site. It pretty much covers nicotine withdrawl related stuff.

Come and check it out if you get time :-)

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